Marriage

  1. Home
  2. People & Relationships
  3. Marriage

Forks in the Road

Photo: Nick Koudis / Getty Images

Keep a monthly journal and list the important decisions you make together as a way to reflect on the forks in the road in your marriage.

More Communication Tips

Sheri & Bob's Marriage Blog

January is "Get Organized Month"

Sunday January 11, 2009
Although the NAPO, National Association of Professional Organizers, declared January as "Get Organized Month," we don't think we will meet that deadline.

Lack of organization and too much clutter have been issues in our marriage since we first got married. One of our first arguments was about the number of aquariums that Bob had -- 13.

Now that we are in the midst of remodeling our house, we are keeping our promise to one another that as a room is finished, it will be organized and clutter free. We have three rooms in that category and with the kitchen due to be finished next month, we will be able to add another room to the list.

But it isn't easy. Hopefully, by January 2010, we can say we are organized! Oh -- Bob only has two aquariums now.

Related:
     ADD and Marriage
     The Cost of Clutter
     Clear Away Clutter
     Do Opposites Attract?
     Why Nagging Doesn't Work

Rain Rain Go Away

Thursday January 8, 2009
We are in the midst of lots of wind and lots of rain. Normally, I love rain. That's good since we live in the Pacific Northwest. But today I realized I'm tired of the rain. Really really tired of the rain. Thank heavens for Bob's spontaneity.

http://z.about.com/d/marriage/1/0/i/P/780502sm.jpg

When the power went out this afternoon, I got grumpy. My plans and expectations for the day were obviously not going to be met. Bob didn't have to ask me twice if I wanted to go shopping. I became less grumpy right away!

Even though there was lots of wind and rain across the river, that area still had power. Aside from getting soaked and chilled every time we got out of the car, we enjoyed the afternoon and had a nice dinner out. When we got home early this evening, the power was back on. Instead of having a disappointing afternoon, we had a pleasant one.

Looking back through the years, spontaneous moments created some of our favorite memories. We highly recommend that you keep spontaneity in your marriage. Don't allow yourselves to become so attached to a schedule that you don't do something spontaneous now and then.

Related:
     Get Your Marriage Out of a Rut
     Winter Blahs
     Talk About Your Expectations

True Love Does Last -- Scientific Proof

Tuesday January 6, 2009
There's a diamond commercial on television that shows a young couple walking quickly and passing an elderly couple holding hands and walking slowly. The message conveyed is that true love lasts. Couples in long term marriages know this. Now scientists are saying it too.

About time! Couples like us who have been married a long time still feel passion and wobbly knees.

According to John Harlow and Brendan Montague, a scientific team from Stony Brook University in New York scanned the brains of new lovers and couples married 20 years. "Brain scans have proved that a small number of couples can respond with as much passion after 20 years as most people exhibit only in the first flush of love."

"The findings overturn the conventional view that love and sexual desire peak at the start of a relationship and then decline as the years pass."

Full Article:
      Scientists discover true love

Related:
     Tips for a Long Lasting Marriage

Disappointed But Okay

Saturday January 3, 2009
Today was a disappointing day for both of us, but we are okay. Just disappointed.

Photo ©  Bob Stritof

See the picture of our beach. That is how it is supposed to look showing that the weather is clear and dry so we could drive through the foothills and have a late Christmas with our son, daughter-in-law, and two granddaughters.

That is not how the beach looked today. The weather alerts we received last night and this morning had phrases like "snow levels will be 500 feet or less ... accumulations of 3 to 6 inches are possible through Saturday morning ... be prepared for snow covered roads & limited visibilities." Frustrated is another word that comes to mind.

Although extremely disappointed, we mutually decided to cancel the trip. Bob packed the Christmas presents in a big box and we will ship them out to the kids on Monday. So although today we both moped around the house, we did what we tell others to do. We talked about our feelings and accepted that we were both going to be grumpy.

I decided to spend the day doing nothing productive. I was viewing photos of our home area in the snow, and as a result found a magnetic poetry site that is better to use than cluttering up our refrigerator! I wrote a message, closed the window, clicked on the link again in a different window, and the message was still there. I am easily impressed.

Related:
     Make Mutual Decisions
     Talk About Your Expectations
     Share What is in Your Heart

Discuss

Community Forum

Explore Marriage

More from About.com

Marriage

  1. Home
  2. People & Relationships
  3. Marriage

©2009 About.com, a part of The New York Times Company.

All rights reserved.