No one seems to have any good feelings left about the live-action version of the classic anime Akira. It came off as a bad idea back when it was first pitched in the Nineties, and now that an actual production is being set up at Warner Brothers, bad vibes are rising from the project like heat distortion from a Nevada sidewalk.

And now Robert Brockway at Cracked.com claims he's been sent a leaked copy of the screenplay for the live-action Akira. "It's worse than you think" was the headline for the article. My original response was "I don't know about that; I've got a pretty good imagination!" But then I clicked on the article and began to read, and now I freely plead guilty to not being nearly imaginative enough.

If the script is genuine, if the article is accurate, the live-action version of Akira will be an even more monumental botch than Dragonball: Evolution was.

The intrepid few who make up the ranks of Japan's Supernatural Disasters Countermeasures Division bear a heavy burden. It's their job to rid the country of inhuman incursions, and protect the populace from monsters that strike without warning. But few people know--or would ever guess--that the most crucial members of their ranks are a pair of teenaged girls.

They're Kagura and Yomi--one the heir to a powerful lineage of exorcists, and the other an adopted daughter. And they're about to lock swords in a brutal battle that may well determine the fate of the rest of the world.

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The adventures of Kei and Yuri, the far-future "troubleshooters" who cause at least as much trouble as they solve, might be headed to the big screen before long--courtesy of a pair of screenwriters and a certain TV "super-Hiro."

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You wake up just across the street from the White House. In one hand you've got a special cellphone, which you can use to obtain anything from a new change of clothes to a strategic airstrike. In the other hand, you've got a gun. You're now one of the twelve most powerful people alive ... and you don't even know your own name.

This is the premise Eden of the East lobs at the audience in the first few minutes of its opening episode. It's been pitched as "cyberpunk Jason Bourne," and while it has elements of that amnesiac-spy-thriller, it's absolutely its own story.

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