To the person who took my reservation for dinner

Hi Sheryl,
I am wondering where it was. That happens to me all the time. I think it's a
Boston thing. You don't need to post this.

get over it.

Keep it. Everyone had a bad day. But bring a printout of this article and let the manager know it was his place....

Very interesting discussion of this post going on over at my Facebook page, many local chefs and restaurant GMs weighing in. Most echo my sentiment: this is not a detail you want to slight; first impressions matter mightily in the hospitality business, no matter who is on the other end of the phone.

That is a losing attitude. Things are faster-paced these days, haven't you noticed? Do you really care that the receptionist hung up without any further blandishments? Next time do it via the internet and you won't even have to talk with a so-called human being, who is performing an information-gathering task. Give her a break - see if you'd like to say insincere sweet good-byes to strangers two hundred times per day.

uhh I think you should lower your expectations. If it is a popular restaurant, they don't care about you, someone else will fill your seat. Sorry but it is the truth

Why would you even hesitate about this? Boston, and her surrounding communities, has plenty of restaurants with wonderful customer service. I am more than sure that you will hear the two most popular words, "please" and "thank you." from other restaurant staff.

My opinion only, take your stomach, and your wallet, somewhere else.

I'd find another place to eat. If enough patrons cancel reservations, then it's time management looked into the reasons why.
The greeter of the restaurant establishes the "ambiance" immediately, and if you feel slighted, no matter how good the meal, you'll tell people that the place disappointed you. Bad reviews can kill the business.

Without punishing the entire establishment and the others who work there, you can inform a manager the day and time that you called and relay your experience. Then the restaurant can deal with it accordingly.

My two cents.

It's all perception. What's the point? Did you want a reservation at a restaurant? or a date with the reservationist? Or, a free toaster? If your angst is still about "civility", you might do well to remember that "other" people have "lives". The chances that unforeseen and unfortunate circumstances will affect (or is that impact these days?) a person on any given day are always good. Besides, it's not always just all about you. Take two chill pills and call a former Durgin Park waitress in the morning.

If you decide NOT to keep the reservation, please cancel it (the waitstaff will suffer, not the person who took your reservation) and let the manager of the restaurant know why.

Get over it

The discussion on MC Slim JB's Facebook page can be found here: http://www.facebook.com/mcslimjb#!/mcslimjb/posts/166104446778517

not honoring your reservation is as thoughtless as a reservation taker who does not want to become your new best friend in the course of a one or two minute business transaction. i would love to know the name of the restaurant so i could give them my patronage because it sounds like a very professional organization. i wonder if their servers are as business-like as the person taking the reservation. i detest having a server who wants to continually interject him/herself into my dining experience without an invitation.

You don't know if the person was being pulled in several directions by management, or just given a set of demands that "were all due yesterday". You could have called back and asked to reconfirm your reservation, explaining that "your call was dropped". Outside of that, based on how you described the incident, just let it go. Life is too short to make a mountain out of a molehill.

Passive-agressive much?

The world would be a better place if people actually confronted their problems rather than whining about them online. The two people who can actually solve your problem are the person you talked to on the phone and that person's manager. If you really want to solve this problem, you need to talk to one of them.

Otherwise, you let it go and move on with your life.

This is what you should do. Have a good cry, search Amazon for every Leo Bascaglia book you can find and buy them, buy a huge stuffed animal, cry again some more then get a tattoo on your forehead "Hyper-sensitive Bostonian" and the world becomes a better place.

Then cry some more about someone on the telephone who was too busy to say good-bye.

I'd say lower your expectations about the restaurant. Assume that whatever you've heard about the food is accurate but the service will probably be rough around the edges. That's the way I'd describe the receptionist: rough around the edges.

If that gives you an overall picture of a restaurant you no longer want to go to, cancel, otherwise don't.

If this is your biggest concern in life, you have an awful lot to be thankful for!

Something like that would not bother me. The person confirmed your reservation and felt that was enough. I don't think the person was being rude intentionally.

Keep the reservation and have a nice dinner.

Aside from people being less civil these days and people not getting any training (or caring about) customer service accidents do happen. I've been known to drop the phone or push the "off" button by mistake, or fumbled the sequence to take the next call so it seemed I hung on on the other person on purpose. Case in point: In my previous attempt to leave a comment I hit the return key by mistake thus submitting the comment without the required email address.

You can't always assume it is about you.

I'd be more concerned if the waitstaff was rude or impatient. Then I might not go back.

Give me a break!

You are out for vengeance because someone forgot to say a couple of words you were expecting. She made a minor faux pas, and who knows what she was going through at that moment. You are being downright mean.

Vindictiveness is not a useful part of polite society. Perhaps it is you who is more in need of a lesson in good manners.

The restaurant doesn't really care as it is a popular venue and can always fill your seat. Plus people who work at these menial jobs (the woman on the phone) are so poorly paid no matter how prosperous the restaurant is they don't care about being friendly. Get over it and eat somewhere else.

I'm surprised you picked up the phone for the res. I find it much more efficient to use OpenTable. Anyways, I would take your business elsewhere. I can't stand the smug attitudes at some places, and there are plenty more that would welcome your business with open arms, and a thank you.

An even bigger problem is that, often, when you arrive at the restaurant, the same attitude prevails. I have had numerous meals at Boston area restaurants in an atmosphere that conveys 'you are lucky to be eating here', when in fact, the feeling should be just the opposite: that it is the restaurant's privilege to have my business. What surprises, and disappoints me is that people have come to believe that this dismissive attitude is an attribute of a high quality dining (as reflected in other posts here). Sheryl, I hope you will use this opportunity to send a message that it is not.

Open Table. That's all I have to say.

Just because it's popular restaurant does not mean it is good. I would call the restaurant and ask to speak to the person in charge or if they have a Facebook page I would send a message. A similar thing happened to me at the Russel Tavern in Harvard Sq.

Just accepting it as Rude behavior and they will fill the seats no matter what is entirely the wrong attitude. Unfortunately this is becoming the norm of late. Rude behavior in the services industry. I think we have to change our behavior and be more pleasant in our greeting and departures while serving others in our jobs. Why you ask. Because someone else will.
You should keep the reservation but only if you talk to the restaurant manager/owner and let them know about the first impression you got, or even better write a letter. Next time you call for a reservation and the samething happens, then you call back and cancel.

File this under: white whine. For reference: see www.whine.com

Skip! If the people up front are rude, it is indicative of a systemic problem.

I would cancel it. I refuse to reward bad behaviour, and in this case, the frontline employee (girl on the phone) was rude. Its never ok just to hang up on someone, especially when its a business related conversation. I would email the restaurant, or contact them somehow to notify them of the behaviour and the fact that you will be dining at a competitors establishment on that night. Just my two cents...

I certainly don't think it would hurt the hostess to say, at the very least, a quick "thank you". A little bit does go a long way...

shes probably busy,, were you looking for a friend? or a reservation? get over yourself

Sounds like she doesn't value her job very much. Get rid of her.

I'm astonished that some of the posters think you should "get over it" because "life is faster-paced now." Somebody whose job is to interact with the public couldn't take an extra half-second out of her busy day to be marginally civil? Don't cancel the reservation, but do tell the manager what happened.

I would definitely call back the restaurant, ask to speak to the manager and tell him your experience. It is because of so many people, like those posting here: "get over it" or "did you want a reservation or a date..." that manners and customer service has taken a back seat. These posters are under the impression that manners, kindness and civility don't matter in this fast paced world. News flash: When all is said and done, it does, even if the civility is fake, just to get the job done. These posters and people who lack manners and don't care about impressions will always end up on the short end of everything that really matters. They'll figure it out as they get older that they are not entittled and that sometimes being humble will get you further in lifer.

people in the service inusdtry are rude because people are jerks when it comes to food. In college when I worked at a pizza joint I can't tell you how many people are willing to scream vulgarities at you for not having something just the way they like.

Customer Service has become a lost art. I'm not sure if it's lack of training or lack of time or lack of caring, but every customer should be made to feel like they are the very best customer that you have.

I would cancel the reservation.

Don't go. Send a note to the manager why. Maybe they can refine, or hire, someone who knows how to treat customers and doesn't consider them annoyances.

Strange as it may seem, some restaurants actually promote the idea that they are doing you a tremendous favor by deigning to allow you entrance. The fact that you were irritated enough to question your choice should answer your question for you. If civility is a necessary component of my fine dining experience (it is), I would not only go somewhere else, but I would make sure management knew why.

Maybe there were people standing in front of her waiting to be seated. Or . . . she could have had another call coming in or already on hold. Ever try to juggle phone calls in a public service position? Tough job. Maybe you could let the manager know, but do so with a healthy dose of compassion.

From my perspective (shopkeeper), EVERY CUSTOMER IS PRECIOUS. Spend your hard earned dollars where you will be appreciated.

(Also, call the restaurant and ask to speak to the owner. They will be grateful you told them about a problem!)

Talk about having nothing to write about...

Let me tell you about this person I let take a turn ahead of me in traffic. No wave, no head nod, not even a little horn beep...can you believe that?

Advise me: Should I go find them and demand that they wave to me next time?

i agree with number 3

I own a business and we have a rule for telephone etiquette: always answer with "good morning" (or afternoon) and always end with "thanks, bye." There is NO excuse for skipping these courtesies because they are what is expected from a professional organization. If you're having a bad day you don't take it out on the customers (or anyone else for that matter), just be a grown-up and act like one. As a parent I insist on politeness from my children and they can handle it, so a service person in a service industry should be expected to as well.

I was in the restaraunt biz for many years. I would cancel my reservation and tell the management why.

The fact that you were treated this way on the phone by someone whose job is to answer the phone and take reservations shows that the restaurant does not care about great service.

It takes two seconds to say "please" and "thank you", two words that seem to be missing more and more in conversation these days. That being said, what's the big deal?

The attitude of the person who takes the reservation sets your expectations. If you've been treated courteously initially, you are probably more likely to approach your dining experience with the same attitude. If not, everyone else involved in your meal needs to perform that much better in order for you to appreciate the experience.
People encouraging you to "chill" or "get over it", are probably people who feel the same way about whatever job they do -- minimal effort and if it's not good enough, too bad.
If the restaurant is that popular, it behooves them to keep it that way by providing a positive experience -- from reservation to dessert.

The person was being civil and professional. The issue is with you, not them. You are the one who requires the use of "magic words" to soothe your psyche. Not everyone knows your magic words.

Life sounds incredibly harsh, Sheryl. You've been dealt a very bad hand, but hang in there and you will persevere. My thoughts and prayers will be with you as the waiter arrives with your foie gras.

By Tim Spinotter: "you won't even have to talk with a so-called human being, who is performing an information-gathering task"

humans not automatons; humans social animals; need primate and/or mammalian interaction to stay sane; w/o such intercations humans turn into misanthropists who love their tech toys more than fellow meat beings, aka Spinotters

It is your first contact with a place where you will spend an evening and a lot of money. I'm sure the same person who took the call will greet you at the restaurant warmly instead of being matter-of-fact when dealing with a disembodied voice. But you want to feel comfortable there and right now you have no signs suggesting that you will. I'm sure you'll have a great time at the restaurant, so I wouldn't do anything about it. It would just be nice if people would be especially polite in phone calls and e-mails where body language and non-verbal cues are absent. But you also have to give people the benefit of the doubt when they're not.

Drop the reservation. This is an employee being paid to take reservations, provide customer service, and represent a good impression. If they're having a bad day, they need to stay home. Let the manager know since there are a lot of other nice people out there who needs a job. Any owner wants to remedy this as quickly as possible, since bad experiences such as these are communicated very quickly.

Wow - I know they say folks from Massachusetts are nasty and impersonal...but, I've been here for over 30 years and I've never seen the kind of cold, hard cynicism that has been portrayed in the majority of the responses to this posting. Seriously folks, are you from New York or did you just get up on the wrong side of the bed today? Where is your sense of common decency for other human beings? Is this really how you treat others and expect to be treated in return? A little compassion and random exchange of pleasantry never hurts in this world...it would obviously do a few of you curmudgeons in Boston some good.

To all that post "other people have lives" and we should just grin and bear it when a receptionist has a bad day or the host is rude.
No.
Those "Other people" also have jobs and are expected to perform them with civility. Keep the reservation but let the manager know that there is bad phone etiquette at their establishment.

I love it when I see remarks about maybe someone was having a bad day, a life, etc. Here is the deal. There were many days while I was teaching that were "bad days" for me. Would you want a teacher who is having a bad day to take it out on your kid? Of course not! Here is how I would have handled this problem, I would have called right back and mentioned that I had been "cut off" and asked if the person needed any more information from me.That gives her a chance to say, either no, that she had everything, "Thank you", or to say that she was sorry, but she had pressed the wrong button, or whatever may have happened. That way, you would have your answer about whether or not to patronize the restaurant.

It's Boston.

I moved out of the region recently and have been floored by friendly and efficient customer service everywhere from high end furniture stores to K-Mart to restaurants.

is it possible the call was dropped or otherwise disconnected?

if not, it says a lot about the way we treat each other that so many excuse the complete lack of civility and professionalism reflected in the behavior you describe. sure the world has bigger fish to fry but is the barest minimal courtesy really too much to ask of another human being? sad that many of us don't expect anything better.

It takes ONE SECOND to say "see you then", or "thanks, bye". It is flat-out RUDE to hang up on somebody without saying something. It is IMPOSSIBLE to be too busy to say "thanks, see you then". I am a "rough", rugged type man and it is NOT being sensitive to think that hanging up on somebody is RUDE. I worked at a few hotels and restaurants while I was in college, and I would NEVERhang up on somebody, UNLESS they were rude or snotty, and that only happened anout once per year. Call back and ask the hostess another question, if she is RUDE again, call back TELL THE MANAGER and then cancel your reservation and eat at a friendly place that WANTS your business.

Ha ha, lots of responses, from deal with it, you crybaby to bring it up with the manager. You might try the latter, and see how they respond. Do it with a smile and you'll find out more about the culture. Maybe two other lines were ringing and the hostess immediately worried about what you thought.

Very often if the owner/GM is a complete jerk, the best they get from their employees is efficient rudeness; the worst will sabotage your experience. And they won't have a clue why that is the case.

Great guest service culture comes from attention to detail, including what the staff needs to do a great job. They want to make money, or they wouldn't be there. A GM who understands that and supports the staff can bend the culture any way they want it to go.

I've come to the sad conclusion that etiquette seems to have gone by the wayside these days. Whether it's rude hostesses/servers in a restaurant, or contractors/builders who don't return telephone calls, something is now missing. Please and Thank You should be the most used words in our everyday speech (along with I Love You), yet they are the least heard these days. Why? Have we become too "big for our britches" or are we better than anyone else? We are all humans, and a little kindness goes a long way. There's no excuse for bad manners.

I'm stunned at the number of people telling Sheryl to "get over it" or "lower her expectations." It's that person's JOB to be polite. It's called customer service, people!

I would still go, but if it irks you that much, report it to the management. They should know that you considered canceling your reservation over it.

I have an infant and made a point to tell the person on the other end of the phone that I had a baby (and it was a Saturday night) and confirmed that would be ok. She politely acknowledged my situation and said it would be fine. I got to the restaurant, we were seated in a booth, tightly jammed with another large party directly behind us, and nowhere to put our baby. The restaurant manager came up to me and said "I know you're new at this, but, in the future, it is helpful if you tell us when you call that your'e going to have a baby" I explained that I certainly did tell the receptionist, and the manager from that point forward was apologetic, but I was so put off by that sarcastic comment ("I know you're new at this...") that I had a bad night, regardless. I agree with others that customer service is the most important part of a meal out, you're paying for more than the food. I'd go somewhere else if you felt that offended. It's up to you how you feel, not the rest of the world to make the decision for you...

I know I won't go to the restaurant I'm commenting about again.

I'd cancel the reservation in a heart beat. As others have said, there are way too many great restaurants to allow one to treat you unprofessionally.

Don't forget that these people work in the service industry. Bad day or not, you do not bring your problems to work.

The number of responses making light of your question explains the attitude of the person you spoke with. There is little room for civility anymore, and I find it as unacceptable as you do.

I would cancel your reservation, tell the manager why, and find someplace that would be glad to have your business and let you know that.

We were addressed as "hi kids" by the waiter at the 99 and then told not to touch the light bulb over the table by the same waiter. Might have been ok if we were teenagers, but 65+?. Polite doesn't exist anymore.

People seem to misinterpret efficiency with courteousness. It is possible to be both, it doesn't have to be either or. There really is no reason for someone in the hospitality trade to not observe the most basic forms of civility like beginning a conversation with hello and ending with goodbye. The reservationist at that point represents the restaurant and as such, sets the tone. I am sure her manager or owner would not be happy if her lack of manners scared off even one paying customer and they should be made aware of the situation. This is something where other workers can start to adopt the same attitude and that would be disatrous. I mean it's call the hospitality industry, being hospitable is just as important as the quality of food and decor.

If you look for reasons to be offended, you will surely find them.

Call them back and make a reservation for 6 or 8 during prime time a couple of weeks from now. Then don't show up. As mentioned above, it takes one second to say "thank you."

The world would be a better place if people actually confronted their problems rather than whining about them online.

AMEN!

really??? maybe this person was dealing with other people & that's why she was quick to hang up...? MY pet peeve is when i'm speaking to someone (cashier, hostess, etc) person -to-person & they stop helping me to help someone that called. I say let the phone ring & help ther person who is standing in front of you.....

The fact of the matter is that most people in Boston can be very short and come across as rude. This is what many tourists are prepared for. I moved out of State a few years ago and when I come back, it amazes me how many establishments can be downright rude. I don't think most of them know they are doing it. I love Boston and find myself defending the city as "you have to get to know the people". I once called a company to give them some major business and the receptionist made me want to hang up and call somoen else. Once I pointed this out, she changed her tune very quickly. The "voice" of your organization can be hurting your bottom line.

I think your making more of this than you need to. But that is my opinion. If you are really upset with it then take your business elsewhere. And your opinion is really the only one that matters.

If you go and have a great experience then this won't be a big deal. But if you go and have anything other than a mind blowing great time the initial phone call is going to sit with you and you will look to find every excuse as to why you didn't enjoy your meal and company. Again, your opinion/feeling is the one that counts and if you are really uneasy about the phone call then you might want to go elsewhere.