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SaraKay Smullens
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SaraKay Smullens (www.sarakaysmullens.com) is a licensed diplomate in clinical social work and and a trained family therapist and educator. She has been certified as a group psychotherapist by American Group Psychotherapy Association and as a certified family life educator by the National Council onFamily Relations.

A recipient of a lifetime achievement award by the Pennsylvania chapter of the National Association of Social Work, SaraKay is a best-selling author of Whoever Said Life is Fair? and Setting YourSelf Free: Breaking the Cycle of Emotional Abuse in Family, Friendship, Love and Work.

Her paper, "Achieving An Emotional Sense of Direction," can be found on her website. This model is described in greater detail in a paper entitled "The Codification and Treatment of Emotional Abuse in Structured Group Therapy, published in the International Journal of Group Psychotherapy, 60 (1) 2010.

SaraKay's public social work papers, which document a professional lifetime of community organization, advocacy and activism, are shared by the archives of Goucher College and the University of Pennsylvania.
 
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Blog Entries by SaraKay Smullens

When Women Are Abused: Dominique Strauss-Kahn's Shadow of Shame

Posted August 27, 2011 | 04:56 PM (EST)

Hundreds of thousands of dollars later Dominique Strauss-Kahn, his wife Anne Sinclair, and his lawyers are rejoicing at what an August 24th New York Times headline called a "Quick and Quiet End to the Strauss-Kahn Case." Perhaps this group should hold the champagne...

Meanwhile Manhattan DA, Cyrus R. Vance,...

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SlutWalk in Philly and WorldWide: Long Overdue Focus on the Blame and Shame of Women

23 Comments | Posted August 11, 2011 | 04:18 PM (EST)

"YOU are going to Walk with the Philly SlutWalkers on August 6th , AND dress in a slutty way?" a very good and savvy friend asked me for the second time --- her voice incredulous.

"Yes, I am -- in an age appropriate slutty way," I responded.

"What's that?"...

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Mr. President: Go to War Against the Malignancy of Compartmentalization Before It's Too Late

12 Comments | Posted August 8, 2011 | 02:55 PM (EST)

This blog is a plea to President Obama to stand up against a growing malignancy of ideas with no basis, and, with passion and plain talk (and no fancy words), explain to our citizens why we must join together and fight for the health and sanity of our country.

...
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Perspective Please! In Support of Anthony Weiner

57 Comments | Posted June 10, 2011 | 05:02 PM (EST)

There are enormous and complicated conflicts between the underpinnings of a puritanical American and overwhelming sexual urges that can seem impossible to contain and understand. Such conflicts make people so uncomfortable that rather than speak seriously about them, they become fodder for jokes and ridicule.

What better example is...

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Beware of Oozing Charm: Schwarzenegger's Betrayal

28 Comments | Posted May 23, 2011 | 06:30 PM (EST)

When Maria Shriver was a young college graduate, she was an intern at Philadelphia's KYW TV news station. On occasion she would call me for background information on stories she was working on. Two words to describe her: competent and lovely. At this time, she was a very close friend...

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Color-Blind in Philly: A Courageous Teacher Takes a Stand

Posted March 16, 2011 | 02:49 PM (EST)

There is hope for all of us when people and organizations view actions for what they really are, and do not offer support or aid based primarily on skin color, culture, ethnicity or sex.

Such hope is being illustrated by a bittersweet saga now unfolding in my hometown, Philadelphia.

...
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'Blue Valentine': The Difference Between Falling in Love and Falling in Need

Posted February 13, 2011 | 11:12 AM (EST)

The extraordinarily well-acted film "Blue Valentine" is being promoted as a film showing the eventual death of young marital love. Its cynical message: Marital love cannot last. This is underscored by two heartbreaking renditions of the Ink Spots' "You Always Hurt the One You Love."

Nothing is further from the...

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The Complexities of Letting Go

Posted January 27, 2011 | 10:05 PM (EST)

Ending a relationship due to lack of stimulation and desire is not neat and easy, especially when children are involved.

If you are the one who ends the relationship, and you are a decent human being, there will be pangs of guilt. Such as the 33 year old guy,...

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In Defense of Ed Rendell: Lesley Stahl Knew Just What She Was Doing

Posted January 10, 2011 | 11:51 AM (EST)

So much hoopla in the Sixty Minutes temper department! Have you followed it? On January 9th, Lesley Stahl interviewed the soon to be Ed Rendell of Pennsylvania (my home state) about the relationship between gambling and addiction. Her message was clear: Casinos promote addiction. Rendell has supported casinos in Pennsylvania....

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The Horror of Withholding a Jewish Divorce: Looking Beneath the Surface of A Horrific Law

Posted January 6, 2011 | 09:12 PM (EST)

Many find the following impossible to believe: According to Jewish law only a husband, and never a wife, can "give" a Get, or Jewish divorce. Although a Jewish woman can delay the process of a divorce, she must eventually acquiesce if her husband wishes one.

A vindictive husband, however,...

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The Tincture of Time and Talk: Helping Ailing College Students Develop an Emotional Sense of Direction

Posted December 20, 2010 | 12:08 PM (EST)

Emotional health challenges on college campuses today are overwhelming.

A recent study by the American College Counseling Association concludes that most students visit campus counseling centers with universal post-adolescent difficulties, such as devastation following a romantic breakup, academic pressure, confusion and difficulty defining their futures.

However, 44 percent...

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Elizabeth Edwards: Life Lessons on Need, Love, and Divorce

Posted December 9, 2010 | 05:50 PM (EST)

Elizabeth Edwards will be ever remembered as a woman who offered hope to the suffering, as well as one who stood up valiantly for economic well being and protection for those denied these rights. She was fierce, brilliant, and authentic in her reasoning and her pleas on their behalf. Even...

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The WikiLeaks Release: Where Are the Grown Ups?

Posted November 30, 2010 | 11:21 AM (EST)

It has not been proven exactly who leaked volumes of confidential US diplomatic material from the State Department to WikiLeaks, which was then picked up by major newspapers world wide. But to call the printing and distribution of this material reckless is a vast understatement.

While a disgruntled employee...

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Can Kindness Be Contagious?

Posted November 29, 2010 | 08:19 PM (EST)

Several years ago I began a quiet project that offered no feedback. Nevertheless it has been privately rewarding. Then something happened, and my project did give incredibly positive feedback. I want to tell you about it, for maybe you would like to join in, and maybe the result will be...

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Divorce: Facing Realities With Hope, Not Fear

Posted November 17, 2010 | 10:45 AM (EST)

I know divorce inside out and upside down. I have been divorced. One third of the clients I work with are deciding whether or not to divorce, going through a divorce, or living with the realities of divorce.

There is great confusion about the impact of divorce on children. In...

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Mr. President, Please: Learn From Dukakis' Worst Political Blunder

Posted September 26, 2010 | 07:18 PM (EST)

I remember the event, a presidential debate, like it was yesterday. The date, October 13, 1988. Susan Estrich, Michael Dukasis' campaign manager, knew that Dukasis was vulnerable due to his opposition to the death penalty. This vulnerability was intensified because while governor he supported a controversial prison furlough program. During...

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For Shame, Governor McDonnell: The Execution of Teresa Lewis

Posted September 24, 2010 | 01:03 PM (EST)

Governor Bob McDonnell
Patrick Henry Building
1111 East Broad Street
Richmond, Virginia 23219

Dear Governor McDonnell:

Millions of people all over the world were horrified as you disgraced America, not to mention the proud state of Virginia, by allowing Teresa Lewis, a mentally and emotionally limited woman,...

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The Duck Ride in Philly: Catastrophe to Learn From

Posted July 19, 2010 | 06:25 PM (EST)

I am not sure if the news reached you, but horror has hit Philadelphia. It is the kind of horror that can hit any community. And it provides food for thought for all regarding the balance between taking a chance on a new activity, and personal safety.

This horror involved...

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Tipper and Al: The End of an Era

Posted June 3, 2010 | 01:00 PM (EST)

I was stunned when I read that Al and Tipper Gore were separating after 40 years of marriage. But then five minutes later, their decision did not seem stunning at all. To paraphrase the late Ann Landers, "Some good marriages do not make it to the finish line."

There are...

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Leaving the Party: The Journey of Arlen Specter

Posted May 19, 2010 | 10:43 PM (EST)

There is only one reason that I am glad that Arlen Specter lost his heated Pennsylvania Democratic primary to Joe Sestak: As his friend for over 40 years, I will no longer feel compelled again and again to try to explain his decisions or describe, with examples, the core of...

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