This World Cup, sadly, is proving that rugby in our neck of the woods is soft, stodgy and stale and, oh, the All Blacks will win the cup. And what a fantastic World Cup it's been so far.
Luckily there was Northern Hemisphere side to the World Cup play-offs because we are not on the same planet as Australia, New Zealand and South Africa at the moment. And with Argentina joining them and Georgia and others progressing there could be a new world order.
Only the Welsh, robbed by a red card, have anything close to the ferocity of our neighbours South of the equator.
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Auckland, North Island
We can quantify so many of the key variables in rugby - points, tackles, turnovers, possession, penalties. But in these last few frantic hours before this weekend's World Cup semi-finals, the great rogue factor is suddenly alive in the Auckland air: confidence.
Supporters of all four nations have been pouring into town since Wednesday, almost all of them with beaming smiles on their chops to go with the pint pots in their hands. The exceptions are those wearing black shirts, the ones who, by those statistics that can be stacked up, should be the happiest of all.
New Zealand is nervous. New Zealand is worried. New Zealand is starting to think the whole horrible World Cup nightmare might be about to happen all over again.
The knock-out stages are traditionally a bad time for All Blacks fans, the point where four years of world domination come crashing down in a flurry of intercepted passes, dramatic injuries to key men and moments of heart-breaking brilliance from opposition backs.
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Could rugby union, with it's 'game for all shapes and sizes' and its penchant for collision injuries ever, really, be the number one game of choice in a group of islands with a burgeoning obesity crisis and a love of soccer?
Mmmm. Discuss. How would you do that?
My own personal opinion, if you want it, is that countries like Scotland and England have become car-dependent, TV-watching, complaining countries that breed people who are, frankly, softer than your average Kiwi, Australian, South African, or even Frenchman.
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© 2011