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By Ben Dirs
Join the discussion...
DJ in the TMS inbox: "So disappointed. We never seem to learn. Batsmen who won’t keep the run-rate going and bowlers who seem unable to bowl a controlled over. Also this has been the worst fielding display I’ve seen from an England team in many a year. Also can’t help thinking that you should pick your best wicketkeeper no matter what the form of the game as it is so important a position."
So, good game at least, but England have got much to think about. Some ropey old bowling, especially from Dernbach, some ordinary fielding and far too many dot balls when they're batting. I am, however, not going to blame it all on Jonathan Trott...
Four inside the circle for England, here comes Trott... BOOF! Dhoni whirls away through the off-side and Dhoni marmalises Bresnan through the covers for four. Three needed from five... AND AGAIN! All over with four balls remaining, you have to say MS Dhoni has got a gigantic set on him, 'The Finisher' delivers again to condemn England to a 3-0 series defeat.
WIsden editor Lawrence Booth: "Not the best of games behind the stumps for poor old Craig Kieswetter. And now I see what they mean by Dernbach's variations: single, wide, no-ball..."
Dernbach to continue... Dhoni run out! NOOOO! Kieswetter has made a real dog's dinner of that, swivelling to whip the bails off only to kick down the stumps before he made contact with his gloves. Massive let-off for India. High full-toss from Dernbach and that's a single when perhaps it should have been a no-ball. Another slower ball from Dernbach and this time Dhoni very nearly drags it on, but picks up one. Another slower ball and this time Jadeja nicks one... Oh dear - wide from Dernbach, he's rather melting in this heat... next up it's a beamer, which equates to a no-ball and a warning, but no free hit, bizarrely... DUNCAN FLETCHER IS SMILING - MIGHT AS WELL PAY OUT NOW ON AN INDIA WIN! Seven needed from the final over, which will be bowled by Tim Bresnan.
Steven Finn lobbed the ball and Cook marshalls his troops for one last push... Jadeja shovels into the off-side for one before Finn serves up a bona fide pie which Dhoni slobbers all over like a hungry, slack-joweled dog, pulling it away for four. Finn's next delivery is in the slot and Dhoni drives for two more. Better from Finn, a yorker, but Dhoni manages to dig it out for a single. FOUR MORE! Thick outside-edge from Jadeja, no slip and it's hands on head time for the bowler. India required 17 from 12...
On Twitter: "As Simon Mann reminds us, India and England have already tied two matches this year. Surely not another? 30 from 18 needed."
We have reached 'one false move and you're dead' territory for both sides. Slow full-toss from Bresnan but Dhoni hits it straight at the fielder and it's only worth one. Short and wide from Bresnan and Ravi Bopara saves four with a fine effort at backward-point. Both sides scrapping like a couple of navvies at kicking out time, all it's going to take is one clean punch... 30 needed from 18...
Dernbach, who's taken some tap today, is back into the attack. Just one from the first two balls but Dernbach is unable to control his slower ball, it's leg-side and Dhoni nibbles it away for four. Dhoni drops it and runs before Dernbach offers width and Jadeja plays an elegant cut for a few - fantastic stop by Bairstow down on the fence. Ten from the over, Dernbach really struggling out there. Thirty-six needed from 24...
A pressure-releaser from Jadeja, who slaps Patel straight over his head for four. But Patel isn't cowed, keeping it tight for the rest of the over and restricting India to eight. Forty-six needed from 30.
From DanKendrick: "India to win it comfortably from here. Twenty20 experience makes this sort of chase pretty comfortably nowadays."
From Stephen Boardman, TMS inbox: "Re: how to talk to ladies or, dare I say it, bowl a maiden over: Easy. Just ignore them, concentrate on the cricket and they will come flocking over. Mind you if you do talk to them put in a word for me as I am single and living with my mum."
Jadeja chips to just short of the man at extra-cover. And that's a ripper from Swann - taking the pace off, giving it a chance, and Jadeja beaten by both turn and bounce. Good over this, just two singles from it, just what England needed.
Patel to continue with his darts - get Dhoni and you'd have to say England are narrow favourites. Six from the over, 56 needed from 42 at eight runs per over...
From Briankeys1962: "How nice to see Dhoni without a helmet.. just like the old days!"
"Interesting to see how India take it from here. At the moment, Dhoni seems content to take the singles."
Cook fiddles with the field before sending Swann over the top... bit of turn for Swann and it very nearly gets through Kohli's defences. One for Kohli to the leg-side, one for Dhoni... KOHLI GONE! Beaten by the turn, but not too much that it was missing the timbers. From skipping happily through a meadow one minute, India are now fumbling through a forest... Jadeja next in and he's off the mark immediately.
"Day three's play has finished in Abu Dhabi - Pakistan declared on 511-6, a lead of 314, and Sri Lanka are 47-1 in their second innings. In Harare, New Zealand ODI debutant Rob Nicol scored an unbeaten century as the Kiwis beat Zimbabwe by nine wickets. Tomorrow, Bangladesh and West Indies get their first Test under way in Chittagong, while England's women kick off their ODI series in South Africa."
Dhoni's got the lid off and he's looking cool as a cucumber. Kohli picks up three more with a squirt down to third-man but that's another good over from Patel - he's done a job today - just four from it. Sixty-six required from 54, time for some Swann.
From Carl Evans, Crepy, TMS inbox: "Re 37th over: I don't know how to talk to women either, but I do know it's not 'your' floor any more."
India skipper MS Dhoni is the next man in and Bresnan beats him with the last ball of the previous over. Dernbach is going to have another over and that's a pretty good ball first-up, full of length and Kohli is unable to do anything with it. Deary me, that's poor from Bresnan - Kohli glides down to third-man and the big man misjudges it and the ball dribbles away for four. In arm-wrestling terms, that's India's hand being lifted slowly back up from the table-top. Two for Kohli to wide long-on before Dernbach serves up a rancid delivery - full-bunger on leg-stump and Kohli just helps it on its way...
Former England captain Michael Vaughan: "Evening India... How are we all? Nervous?"
Raina is the next man in the middle and he survives the final ball of Finn's over. Leg-side nonsense from Bresnan and Kohli fills his boots, tucking to the long-leg fence for four. AND ANOTHER! Raina spreads his legs and flashes and Pietersen takes a straightforward one in the covers. England right back in it...
From fredgardner4: "Rahane scored at the same rate as Trott. Anyone think India will be having a go at him? Thought not. Oh the joys of being English."
This looks like it's going to be another comfortable victory for India, unless someone can pull out a plum for England. What a shot that is from Kohli, just a roll of the wrists and the ball races away to the mid-wicket boundary. Rahane into the nervous nineties now and he comes down the track and has a thrash and misses. OUT! Rahane chips a slower one to Cook in the covers, could be a pivotal moment...
Dernbach thinks he's got Kohli caught behind, but Kieswetter is unable to snaffle it. Kohli went for the hook, got a toe-end, Kieswetter got to it but the ball popped out as he hit the ground. Dernbach furious, he should have taken that. To rub salt into the wound, Kohli unfurls a peach of a four through mid-off. The One Show moved onto our floor on Monday which means we now have lots of ladies roaming around, which is a novelty for the BBC Sport website, believe me. How do you talk to them again?
"Steven Finn was 19 or 20 when I was captain of Middlesex - sometimes I had to leave him out of the side and then face him in the nets, which wasn't pleasant."
Kohli twirls at one, edges, and it doesn't quite carry to Swann at slip. England have a chance here, Kohli looking very edgy at the start of his innings. A couple of singles before Rahane wafts and is beaten.
From Simon, London: "Hilary Angelo Gomes, known as Larry, must be the winner re cross gender names."
Patel is wheeled back into the England attack. Short and wide first up, a lollipop, but Rahane is unable to pierce the field. Whenever the ball goes anywhere near Patel in the field, you can hear the panic in the voices of his team-mates - "GET ON IT, SAMMY!" - as if someone's just rolled a hand grenade on the field. Good over, though, only three singles from it.
"That was a very good catch - Pietersen's at extra cover, it looked like it had looped over him and would land safely, but he toppled backwards and caught it."
Game-breaker! Great catch from Pietersen - Gambhir slashing, not quite getting it, and KP taking a fine catch full stretch over his shoulder. Kohli is the new man in and England attack him straightaway, inserting two slips - they have no choice, it's wickets or defeat from here on in. Kohli with an inside edge onto his pad and Finn very nearly scoops the looping ball, but not quite... Kohli off the mark with a single to third-man.
From Dave from Staffs: "England don't look like taking a wicket, Bresnan and Dernbach look fodder. Give Trott and our batsmen a break as 300 should have been more then enough to defend."
From Geoff Woods, TMS inbox: "Re cricketers with girls' names... I can't think of any, but what about cricketers with peninsulas' names? David Gower and Gordon Lizard to name but two."
Many thanks Mitch, the most ludicrously-named man in sports journalism is back in the hotseat. Let's not sweeten the pill, India are strolling this, 115 needed from 107 balls. Swann to continue and he's getting a bit of tap today, going at almost seven an over. Better, five singles from that one... that's drinks...
More Bopara, three singles for India, a slow computer but no breakthrough - so I hand you back to Ben Dirs...
From Mark, Bolton: "I wish people would stop criticising Trott. It's our bowlers' inability to get wickets that will ultimately cost us this series."
The chuntering Swann has changed ends, he's down on one knee to appeal for lbw against Gambhir as he sweeps, it's close but possibly going down leg... Reprieved, Gambhir brings up his 27th ODi fifty in style (from 53 balls) as he skips down the track and carefully guides a six over long-on! Gambhir guides a single through the covers, Rahane isn't happy with the sightscreen but he nicks the strike with a single wide of mid-on. India "in great shape", the TMS guys agree, and you've got one more over of me (can I stay on if England get a wicket?).
The "drop Bopara" brigade may be taking notice here as Essex all-rounder Ravi B is into the attack for some medium-paced trundling. He sends down a legside wide second ball (credit to India who only leaked three extras in England's innings; the tourists have already conceded eight). Rahane caresses a single through the covers, Kieswetter comes up to the stumps for Gambhir and the left-hander's riposte is to delicately late-cut it past him for a single. Rahane plays a right-handed version of the same shot with the same result. Bopara goes round the wicket to the southpaw Gambhir, who flicks an easy single off his pads - five off the over, and a Mexican wave on the go.
After a single from Gambhir, Cook brings a fifth fielder into the ring as Dernbach attempts to put the squeeze on Rahane, who paddles a single to fine leg. Gambhir pokes a shorter delivery straight to backward point and it;s looking like a much better over from the tattooed Surrey paceman, until Gambhir blasts a four through the gap at extra cover. Six from the over - 131 needed from 21 overs. Just over a run a ball.
From Ste: "On the subject of unique names isn't AB De Villiers the only Abraham to have played Test cricket?"
Very possibly - Test cricket is also awaiting its first Luke (barring a brief sub-fielder appearance by Luke Wright in South Africa a couple of winters ago).
Gambhir pushes an easy two to Samit Patel in the deep, but bowler Swann isn't happy. "What are you doing? Come on!" he yells at his Notts team-mate, although Sunil Gavaskar on TMS thinks "not even Superman" would have prevented two there. Riled, Swann sends down a ropey legside wide. England may not have Superman on the field, but they've got Jos Buttler on sub-fielding for Pietersen, and he makes a smart stop to turn a likely four from Rahane into a three. Gambhir happy to play the supporting role and pick up ones and twos - he has 41 from 42, Rahane has 76 from 81, and if England lose this I fear "The Trott Debate" may go viral...
With Rahane despatching the ball towards the Seven Seas, Captain Cook shuffles his bowlers by bringing the previously expensive Dernbach (4-0-24-0) back on for Patel. A bouncer deceives the left-handed Gambhir, who tries to flick the next one off his pads and they scamper a leg bye. Rahane and Gambhir help themselves to singles at will - India look like they've worked Dernbach out here - and the home side are past 150, with 147 more needed from 138 balls.
As Prakash Wakankar takes over on TMS, it's Mark Mitchener here for a few overs to allow the Dirs a mid-innings break. (Runners may have been banned from international cricket, but not substitute text commentators). Gambhir dabs a three to third man, but Rahane is the man of the moment, squeezing a two past Cap'n Cook at mid-wicket and punching a four wide of Dernbach at long-off, before plundering two more off the last ball of a rather expensive Swann over.
"India are keeping pace, nine wickets in hand, and the pich is looking good - ball coming on to the bat."
Four singles from Patel's over before the Notts man serves up a full-bunger and Gambhir slashes him away for four... Mark Mitchener is going to take over for a few overs while I take a blow...
From Courtney, TMS inbox: "Re: cricketers with girls' names: SHANE Warne. Not technically a girl's name, but it should be."
From Anonymous: "I notice that TMS are praising Rahane for his innings. A strike rate identical to Jonathan Trott. Why do English commentators like to lambast their own players?"
Innovative shot from Gambhir, just chipping over the infield for one. Six singles from that Swann over, India doing what England fail to do so often, just keeping the scoreboard rolling over. India slightly ahead of where England were at the same stage, four runs in it.
From Anonymous: "Re: precious stones, don't forget Ruby Lee, as of April 2009 Australia's oldest living female Test cricketer!"
From KA, Pinner, TMS inbox: "Re: Darren, Norwich - Lillian Thompson?"
Chance gone down - feather from Gambhir, not much deviation, but it doesn't stick in Kieswetter's mitts. Width from Patel and Gambhir knifes him through cover-point for a couple.
Wisden editor Lawrence Booth: "England's problem so far has been Bresnan and Dernbach: 9-0-67-1. Finn, Swann and Patel: 10-0-39-0..."
Swann to continue - decent leg before appeal against Rahane, but the umpire reckons that was missing leg, presumably. A couple of singles before Rahane unfurls a peach of a shot, dabbing to the third-man fence for four.
From Kev Carlisle, Lincoln, TMS inbox: "I see Ed Smith mentioned the successful run chase of 500 but not his innings of 10 off 92 balls, it makes Jonathan Trott look like a slogger!"
Patel back on with his left-arm darts and India are happy just to keep things ticking over at the moment with ambled singles.
Swann gets a go in the powerplay, which is nice of Cooky, but there's Rahane's fifty courtesy of a tuck round the corner. Three from that over, Swann did a job...
From Darren, Norwich, TMS inbox: "On the subject of cricketers named after precious stones, surely Jade is also a girl's name. How many other (male) cricketers have girls names. Kim Hughes springs to mind."
Bresnan was ruddy livid at the end of that over, England need to calm down a bit here. What a stop that is from Kieswetter - leg-side from Finn and that looked for all the world like four wides. Just two from that over and England needed that, the lid was rattling and rolling and looked like toppling off.
From benapmoore: "All of a sudden, Samit Patel is 'the Notts all rounder', not just a decent bat who bowls as many pies as he consumes."
Over-pitched from Bresnan and Gambhir uses his feet and pushes through for two. A single apiece from the next two deliveries before Bresnan tests out the middle of the pitch and is called for a wide. Ragged from England - not clever that from Bairstow, or indeed Kieswetter, rash throw, no backing up and that's four bonus runs for Rahane. That won't improve Bresnan's mood - Rahane with a sweet glide and that's four more and the Indian hundred.
David Hart (see below), nice try, but I'm almost certain jasper is not a precious stone but rather an opaque rock of virtually any coloor stemming from the mineral content of the original sediments or ash. Any geologists in da house? Four from that Dernbach over, better from the lavishly tattooed one.
"I was part of an England A side in India in 2004 which managed to concede one of the highest run chases in the history of the game - the oppposition chased down over 500!"
From David Hart, TMS inbox: "Jade Dernbach the only English cricketer named after a precious stone? How quickly people forget Jasper Vinall, the first cricketer killed during a game..."
Short and leg-side from Bresnan and Patel swivels on it and picks up one. Patel picks up another leg-side delivery but that's a good stop by KP down on the fence to limit the batsman to a couple. PATEL GONE! Leg before, Bresnan - not sure about that, to the naked eye that pitched outside leg... tricky one for the umpire, to be fair, it pitched outside leg by maybe a couple of inches. Gambhir is the new man in and he gets a gimme first-up and carves through point for four. Good comeback from Bresnan, slower ball, Gambhir fishes and misses...
Just two from Patel's over, and it's time for a bowling powerplay...
That's a huge turner from Swann first ball - Patel lunges, is beaten and Kieswetter whips off the bails, but the batsman was well in. Kieswetter goes up again a few balls later, this time for a caught behind, before Patel pokes tentatively at another one that grips and turns. Eventful first over from Swann...
From Steve in Cardiff: "Re: Jade Dernbach being named after precious stone [10th over]. What about [Northants 2nd XI keeper] Jasper Davies?"
Another decent over from Samit Patel, he's doing a decent job out there, just three from it. Not much turn, if any, but then that's not really Patel's game. Time for some Swanny...
Rahane glides to third-man for an easy single, one for Patel and there are two more for Patel to square-leg. All looking a little bit easy for India at the moment...
"England are bowling enough loose deliveries to keep India ticking along."
From fredgardner4: "Forget Trott, Dernbach is consistently praised although all he does is bowl wides and the occasional good slower ball."
Time for some tweak from Samit. I swear I just heard one of the England fielders shout "come on Sandwich". Is that his nickname? Decent enough over from the Notts all-rounder, five from it.
From many people, via text and Twitter: "Re: Matt in Ware (9th over) - a run a ball in 50-over cricket gets you 300."
Jade Dernbach, the only man in English cricket ever to have been named after a precious stone, to continue. Big leg-side wide from the Surrey man before Patel is offered width and he takes advantage, slashing through cover-point for four.
From ShaunLawthom: "It seems being the highest scorer of the innings and holding it together whilst others score is not enough. Maybe if Trott scored 30 from 30 every innings like Bopara people would ignore the failure, how is Ravi still in the team!"
From countycricketkj: "In Trott's ODI career, Eng have scored 298 or more six times. In those six games Trott averages 111."
Apologies, that was Dernbach in the last over, not Finn - the concentration starts to waver... only four runs from Finn's over, but India pass 100. You want my opinion on the Trott debate? I have a sneaking suspicion it's all down to aesthetics - some people just don't like watching him play and his rather ugly demenour at the crease clouds their judgement. The moral of this story? That bloke in your office with the Flock of Seagulls haircut and diabolical jumper? Give him a chance, he might offer more than you think.
From Matt in Ware: "Time will tell just how good Trott's innings was. People moan incessantly about people giving their wickets away or about batting too slowly but if you go at one a ball you only get 250. Trott's contribution has helped us to get up to a reasonable score and in 50 overs we will know whether we batted quickly enough."
Too straight from Dernbach and that's like taking candy from a baby for Patel, a cute little tuck off his pads for three. This pair choo-chooing along at the moment - Rahane with what looked like an educated edge for four. Leg-side again from Finn and he's worked away for two more.
From Dan, London: "Trott cannot win. He is being slated for scoring 98 and anchoring the innings but would be slated if he fell for 80 if he tried to kick on."
Width from Finn and Rahane upper-cuts him for four - Bresnan almost gets there, but it ricochets off his shin and onto the rope. Five from that over, India well ahead of the rate.
Patel really getting stuck into Bresnan - four straight over the bowler's head followed by a top-edged pull for a couple. Bresnan then has an lbw appeal turned down - that hit pad before bat and was probably sliding down leg.
Jack in Huntingdon (see below) your logic demonstrates no logic: he didn't score 98 in 200 balls, he scored 98 in 116 balls. That's like saying of a striker who's scored five goals in 10 matches: "Yeh, but would you be happy he he'd scored five in 3?" Nonsensical. Pretty good bowling from Finn, quick and on the money, just two from that over. It's going mental in Mohali now, everyone in after work.
"I can imagine Steven Finn as a sentry outside Buckingham Palace, or an old-fashioned 'bobby' with a policeman's helmet on."
Jack in Huntingdon in the TMS inbox: "Would James at Leeds Uni (see below) be so happy if Trott got 98 off 200 deliveries? It's ridiculous that he didn't get a hundred, he was in for the vast majority of the innings. He should have got a good century. He isn't inventive enough. He goes too slowly and isn't prepared to accelerate towards the end of an innings. It felt a bit selfish of him really..."
Bresnan sends down a pearler that shapes away and beats Rahane all ends up but his next two balls slide down leg and the second of them is tickled away for four. More leg-side stuff and Bresnan is tucked away for two more and Rahane helps himself to another three with a well-timed prod into the covers.
From cprowe: "Trott played a superb anchor roll yet people still hate. If it wasn't for him we'd have struggled to make 250. Give Trott a break."
Steve Finn bowling with plenty of wheels and that's a pretty good over, just three from it.
From James, not concentrating at Leeds uni, TMS inbox: "Seriously, only England fans could see a guy make 98 runs, carrying the innings and allowing KP and Patel to play shots around him while still scoring at 84.48, and think he isn't good enough. Drop Bopara or KP before having a pop at the one guy who is reliable in the team in the two formats he is selected in."
Bresnan with a new pill of his own, as is the way these days, and his first ball is a doozy, arcing away from the right-handed Rahane. No-ball to follow, though, free hit o'clock - Patel arches his back but doesn't quite get it, two over cover. Sharp start by England in the field, they look switched on.
Patel and Rahane are the Indian openers, Steve Finn the bowler and Patel eases the first boundary away, a screamer through extra-cover. Gadaffi, Stuart Pearce, the Stone Roses, Bin Laden and Samit Patel - no, they didn't walk into bar, it's what's trending on Twitter. Although that would be one hell of a night out. Not sure Ian Brown would have got on with Gadaffi, though, tight as a drum, that lad...
From Simon Knights, TMS inbox: "Pol Pot and the money, Mussolini and the Power; Krushchev after Stalin, Lenin after Tsar, Slobodan's runnin, but Hussein ain't lookin; Pinochet's in the kitchen, Castro dont know what's cookin; Tito say I got ta learn, but Noriega's to teach me; If they cant understand it, how can they reach me?"
From "I. Bell": "Selfish play there from Trott, looked more concerned with getting to a personal 100 rather than risk accelerating for the good of the team."
From Josh failing to concentrate on aerodynamics at Leeds Uni: "There is not even an argument against Trott, England's best batsman again! Few early wickets to get the pressure on please."
"While the players take a break, I can fill you in on today's other international cricket - Pakistan are piling on the runs on day three of their first Test against Sri Lanka in Abu Dhabi, now 511-5 in reply to Sri Lanka's 197 with Taufeeq Umar run out for 236. And in the first ODI in Harare, New Zealand are 63-0 after 12 overs chasing 232 to beat Zimbabwe."
"The great Jonathan Trott debate continues! But we can't really judge his innings without knowing the result. If the Indian batsmen dominate the England bowling as they've done so far, there may have been a case for England pushing the accelerator a little earlier. But the counter-argument is that it can be very difficult to manufacture a situation where you score boundaries or get out - you can keep picking out fielders."
Crackerjack innings from Samit Patel - 70 from 43. As for Trott's innings of 98 from 116, well, we'll only find out when India bat exactly how valuable it was... see you in 40...
Trott on strike and he needs six for his ton. Trott backs away and slaps Vinay through the covers for a couple before strangling into the leg-side for a single. Fine placement from Patel - over cover and it dissects the two fielders running round and dribbles away for four. Trott has a chance for his ton... cheeky one-legged flick but it's only one and he'll be stranded on 98. Patel absolutely piles into the final ball of the innings, six over long-on, and that was a very handy innings from him...
"If you come in, in the fourth over, on a ground like this, you should get a hundred, shouldn't you?"
Praveen has finished up - 1-56 from his 10 overs. Three runs from Yadav's first two deliveries... make that four, Trott heaving over mid-wicket and only managing to pick up one more... Patel backs away but Yadav sees what he's up to and chases him down the leg side - no run. Patel makes amends with a towering six - scratch that, the man upstairs says it was only four. Four more - Yadav striving for the yorker and Patel inside edging through his legs.
Incoming Wisden editor Lawrence Booth: "One problem with a middle order lacking Morgan and Bell: they rarely run the first one hard..."
Patel not the most elegant of cricketers but he's getting the job done - a heave into the leg-side for one before Trott smears through mid-wicket for two. Praveen getting it up into the blockhole, good bowling, and this England pair not able to find the boundary from this over, a very good one for the hosts.
On Twitter: "During interval (around 1330) we are going to discuss the comments made by Andrew Strauss about his fears for the future of Tests. Thoughts?"
Vinay back on and the first half of his over is dots. However, Patel wraps some willow round the fourth delivery, smashing him over mid-wicket for six. Patel doesn't quite get the next ball, slicing over extra-cover for a couple, and he finishes off with a single to mid-on. Fine over from Kumar, that six ball aside.
From Chris, Dundee, TMS inbox: "To be fair, everything sounds awesome with a bit of slap bass. That’s why I always stick a bit of Level 42 on in the background while watching PMQs."
Patel sprays Praveen into the covers, where the ball is athletically saved by your man Kohli. Trott flicks over mid-wicket but it falls just short of the rope and Jadeja does well to save four. Trott picks out deep square-leg next ball before Patel backs away and shovels into the covers for a single. Two more ones, four overs remaining.
Trott makes room and carves Yadav over cover for four. One more for Trott with a poke down the ground. Lots of emails in asking why Patel is in ahead of Bairstow but the Notts man is cooking at the moment - full-bunger from Yadav and Patel clips him away for four. Two more for Patel with an off-drive, 12 from the over.
"Samit Patel has shown the acceleration here - 26 from 20 is exactly the sort of scoring rate England needed."
Six singles from that Jadeja over. I once wrote a very earnest class-conscious song called Unsung Heroes: "Mr Mode was a factory worker, Mrs Mean was a checkout girl; they're both symptoms of the working masses - UNSUNG HEROES!" Sounded awesome with a bit of slap bass weaved over the top.
From Richard, London: "Trott, Cook and Bopara is an awful combination. When will England learn that the one-day game has changed, and we have to change with it. Once Pietersen goes, England are incapable of accelerating. I can't remember the last time Bopara scored at more than a run a ball. I thought he was supposed to be a big hitter. We will lose this game now. Guaranteed."
One for Trott before Patel picks up a four with a chip off his hip. There's four more courtesy of a beefy cover-drive and the Notts man is doing a job here. Neat single into the off-side - wickets in hand, really should reach 290-300 from here.
Jadeja scuttles through another over, five singles from it. The PCA Stadium starting to fill up now as the sun dips behind the stands... Trott tilts his lid and an accumulation of sweat comes out in a torrent...
From Dan Miles, TMS inbox: "Re: Dictator Rap - maybe the next bar was: 'But I ain't never crossed Amin who didn't deserve it. Mugabe treated like a punk, you know that's unheard of...'."
Crackerjack shot from Patel, arching the back and flat-batting Yadav over mid-wicket for four. Trott backs away and smears into the covers for a single before Patel tucks Yadav off his pads for a brace.
From cmwhite198: "Why on earth has Patel come in ahead of Bairstow and his fiery hair? Trott's batting could do with igniting."
England pass 200, but the time for singles is over, they need to step on... have some of that, Ashwin's final ball is heaved over long-on for four... powerplay over, 30-1 from it.
From Dave, Dublin: "Time for Ravi to step aside I'm afraid. He brings nothing to the England team. Let's get some of the young guns in."
From Gareth Pugh, TMS inbox: "I once held a pub door open for an exiting John Hurt. He gave just the right proportion of acknowledgment for such an everyday task."
From Anonymous: "I've always felt England's problem is the batsman who comes in seem clueless as to the match situation. Trott should bat through as he's played and the others should score quickly! Common sense?"
From Richie, Bath, TMS inbox: "In college my friend Jay and I wrote a song about various dictators to the tune of 'Gangster's Paradise' by Coolio. All I remember is it started 'well I've been Colonel Gadaffi so long that even my momma thinks that my mind is gone'."
Praveen back on and Bopara's splattered on his windscreen first ball...
Ashwin continues. Bopara and Trott exchange singles... one more for Bopara into the off-side... Trott fetches for one more... and one more for Bopara...
Trott punches down the ground for one... shot in both legs, apparently - not Trott, Gaddafi... Vinay with a bumper and Bopara tugs him away for a much-needed four. Four more, this time it's Trott ambling down the track and slashing over the keeper's head.
Just three from that first powerplay over, and Bopara almost runs himself out. Strange old innings this from England - from positively spring-heeled they've suddenly curled up into a ball and come over all melancholy. Speaking of which, I hear they've got Gaddafi! Bye Bye Badman indeed. In terms of Top Trumps dictators, he'd be off the richter scale for complete and utter weirdness.
From Sidowski: "Trott & KP score 120 - Trott knocked for rate and KP knocked for not getting 100 every innings - only in England!"
From Geoff Brown, TMS inbox: "I once had a pee next to John Major. I was quite suprised and mentioned I'd never had a pee next to a Prime Minister before. He replied he'd never had a pee next to me before..."
Four for Bopara courtesy of a leg-side glance - time for a batting powerplay, time for some hardcore humpty dumpty...
Just four from Jadeja's over, all in singles... some talk on the telly about Trott being a "quandary" for the England selectors - bit harsh on a man who has scored more ODI runs than anyone in the world this year and who averages 53...
From lawman_147: "Cook should be dropped - not Trott. Similar number of matches played. Similar strike rate. Very different averages!"
From Martyn, Hants: "The door to the gents was held open for me to exit by Peter Firth (Spooks) in Harrods just before Xmas two years ago. Looked just like Harry Pearce, even down to his attire."
Things have rather dried up since that Pietersen dismissal - I should let you know that Trott passed 50 in that previous over - and Yadav is probving pretty difficult to get away at the moment, he's revved it up to 93-4mph. Four runs from that over, one of this pair needs to flick the switch...
From midnightphilos: "People should give KP some credit. He's just scored a decent, important 64, scoring 46 in the last game. That's decent form to me!"
... apologies, computer froze, back now, three singles from that Jadeja over...
"Jonathan Trott has batted in 37 of his 38 one-day internationals and has passed 50 on 18 occasions. Three times, he's gone on to get a hundred."
Yadav nudging 90mph and this is pretty decent bowling from the new man. Bopara on the walk from the final delivery and he's beaten by a ball that shapes away.
"I know things have changed since when I played, but if Keith Fletcher were in charge here, he's tell Trott he's got to bat through the rest of the innings, so Bopara would have to be the aggressor."
Phil, Stoke, in the TMS inbox: "I once held the gents door open for an exiting Robbie Williams in a local Indian restaurant and he was extremely courteous in response."
"Kevin Pietersen has now played 33 one-day international innings since his last ODI century - 111 not out against India in Cuttack in November 2008. Today's 64 was only the second time he had passed 60 in that time - the other occasion being a 78 against Australia in Melbourne at the start of this year."
Jadeja replaces Ashwin... PIETERSEN GONE! Dirty great stride, he's not happy, brave call from Umpire Asnani, but I reckon that was hitting... good knock from Pietersen, he looked in good nick, Ravi Bopara is next up the ramp... Forest Gate's finest is off the mark with a slash down to third-man for four.
Yadav mixing it up - first KP is beaten by one that shapes away and then he does well to dig out a well-directed yorker. Here's Aggers with some cleaning advice on Twitter: "Great Google tip: how to remove hot pan rings from wood table? 'Rub in mayonnaisse'. Hellmans duly rubbed and left overnight: Bingo! Gone." Grass stains from cricket whites? Marmite.
Ashwin still twirling away and he's doing a very good job for his team, neither Trott or Pietersen able to do much more than tickle him for the occasional run. The run-rate still 5.43, England look set for a 300-plus as it stands.
From Jon, Cambridge: "During an A-level experiment on probability, we had to toss a coin 100 times and then record the results. I got exactly 50 heads and 50 tails but because of this my tutor told me I was lying! This rather went against the point of the lesson she was trying to teach."
From Paul in Lancs, TMS inbox: "Do I detect a sense of trepidation at a first Salford winter? Walter Greenwood, Salford's finest depression era (or indeed any era) novelist, had this advice on how to go about Salford winters: 'You fell into the habit of slouching, of putting your hands into your pockets and keeping them there; of glancing at people, furtively, ashamed of your secret, until you fancied that everybody eyed you with suspicion. You knew that your shabbiness betrayed you; it was apparent for all to see. You prayed for the winter evenings and the kindly darkness. Darkness, poverty's cloak. Breeches backside patched and re-patched; patches on knees, on elbows. Jesus! All bloody patches.' Mind you, at least you've got a job."
Yadav wheeled back into the attack and Pietersen marmalises him from outside off to the deep mid-wicket boundary. Yadav then strays onto KP's legs and is helped away for four more. England chug-chugging along very nicely... another drink for KP mand Trott, it's steaming out there...
... three from Ashwin's over (sorry, he bowls his overs fast...)
England just milking the bowling at the moment, doing what they have to do, the dull stuff, the sporting equivalent of removing mould from the grouting. But that's a bit more imaginative from Trott, a reverse sweep for four (let's say that's like building an ornamental pagoda) before Pietersen crashes Jadeja through the off-side to bring up a 48-ball half-century.
Cute shot from Trott, a little dink over his shoulder for a couple but that's another tight over from Ashwin, only three from it. His final ball zoots through and Trott is beaten.
The run-rate 5.24 at the moment, which is pretty handy. Jadeja to continue, and when he's bowling to KP every ball looks like a grenade. Five singles from that over, though...
Pietersen's fear of left-armers is rather peculiar - it's a bit like learning Conan the Barbarian's nemesis is a Koala bear. Three singles from Ashwin's over...
"The real lesson to take from that non-run-out is that one of you still has to hustle. I've seen a lot of people run out by not running hard - Trott could easily have been run out there, despite the fielding error. But Pietersen's mindset could be the key here - there's nothing here to worry him at all. The question is, will he take full advantage and turn this start into a hundred?"
Some left-arm spin now courtesy of Jadeja, slip in for Pietersen. Pietersen scratching about for five balls, it's like he falls to pieces at the sight of a left-armer. So scared, in fact, that he takes a suicidal run and Trott should have been run out - poor running, but the fielding was even worse.
Ashwin to continue with his tweakers and Trott pushes him for an easy single to mid-on. Turn for Ashwin and he's tucked away by KP, but that was a tight over from the off-break bowler from Chennai. Batting powerplay over, 35 from it.
From robinjellis: "England need these two to bat together for the next 15-20 overs to get a competitive total..."
From Patrick, Bristol, TMS inbox: "Re: Bristol City. I held the door open at Burger King for Andy Cole back when he played for City and he never said a word. The arrogance of the man has haunted me ever since."
Classy shot from Pietersen who walks around his crease before settling and carting Praveen through mid-wicket for four. And that's a peach, a cover-drive for four that makes this partnership 53 from only 38 balls. Trott tickles off his pads and should have run up two, but it's too casual and he only manages one. KP nicks the strike, he fancies this...
Two for Trott with a whip to square-leg before KP pushes hard for a brace of his own...
From Tony, Bristol: "Re: Bob, Newcastle [0943] - I once called nine consecutive coin tosses correctly. It was during a wedding reception drinking game. My pint was untouched, whilst my opponent was later seen wheeling round the dance floor holding a flower display above his head!"
Kohli very much a beige Ford Orion of bowlers, but as my old man used to say, as long as it gets me from A to C and safely through B, then it's done its job. That said, he's been pulled after one over and Praveen gets some medicine from KP, who crashes him through the covers for four. Four more through the same area and that's eight from the over.
From Alex, Bath, TMS inbox: "Maybe that helped contribute to Mohammad Amir's no-balls being a whole 'foot-long' over..."
Time for the tweak of Ashwin and Pietersen picks up a sketchy four from a rather wooden prod. That's drinks...
From Ian, Bristol, TMS inbox: "I was out in Bristol last week and saw four Bristol City football players heading into McDonalds for a lunchtime snack. Obviously explains why they're bottom of the league with one win all season."
KP nurdles off his legs for a single as more news reaches me from the Pakistan cricketers' court case in London - Salman Butt, I hear, described a nightwatchman as "a goat to be sacrificed", to titters from the gallery. Bet Matthew Hoggard wasn't laughing, not with that haircut. Two boundaries for Trott, the first courtesy of a pull, the second of a drive through the covers. Signs he's popped into a groove.
Tighter over from Yadav - until the final delivery, which is short and yanked away for four by Trott...
You know I said Kieswetter was looking well set? He was. But he's not any more, Kohli has just shivered his timbers... Pietersen is off the mark with a single and his first boundary is a tickle down to long-leg. Former Pakistan bowler Mohammad Asif has revealed at his court hearing in London that him and his team-mates used to dine at Subway on their tour of England - if ever there was a sign of the lack of professionalism of that side, that was it. Can you imagine the Germany football team eating out every night at Nandos?
From robhelliwell21: "England don't take enough runs off Kohli. Take a few risks and knock his confidence rather than nurdling for singles!"
"You don't often see wicketkeepers in India taking the ball on the rise like Dhoni did there, it's normally around their ankles, but the ball is coming through well."
Time for the pace of Yadav - this boy can send it down over 90mph. Three for Kieswetter courtesy of a nudge off his midriff and Trott keeps things ticking over with a squirted outside edge. Kieswetter looks nice and set now, tucking Yadav round the corner for four, but that's a fine comeback from the bowler, the ball jagging away from the bat. Decent over from England.
From TheRealTopGunn: "Not liking all this negativity towards Trott, he is our best one-day player, FACT."
Kohli into the attack now with his dibbles and dobbles but that affords him some serious in-swing. Kohli looks to bowl off the wrong foot, 'Daffy' Defreitas style, but without Defreitas' pace. One down the ground for Trott, but only three from that over.
"It's scorching hot out there - even Praveen Kumar has one of those ice things around his neck."
That six aside, Kieswetter is strugglign to find the gaps at the moment - another big old mow is stopped in the covers. Kieswetter upper-cuts down to third-man for a couple and leg-slip comes in to a catching position. BOOM! Another six from Kieswetter, backing away and slashing over backward-point. Better from England, positive... Dave Brickwood (see below) - Strike Rate and Average? Have you had a sneak preview of their new album?
From Dave Brickwood, TMS inbox: "Bell is ‘Fool’s Gold’, he is not ‘What the World Is Waiting For’. His ‘Strike Rate and Average’ are ‘ Very Poor’ in international ODIs. I am ‘Begging You’ to stop showing emails from ‘Sally Cinnamons' who know nothing about cricket."
Kieswetter looks to cock the hammer, coming down the track and carving into the off-side, but that's a good stop. A shot of the seam bowlers' 'Everest' on the telly - that graphic that reveals their line and length - and it's very, very tall exactly where it should be. Kieswetter looking to flat-bat down the ground but Praveen gets a hand to it - not really a chance, it almost ripped his fingers off. Lord, lordy, that is gigantic from Kieswetter, a steepler over mid-wicket for six.
Slower ball to Trott and the Warwickshire man very nearly scoops it back to Vinay, who is slathered in sun cream - he looks like he's fallen asleep on an iced bun. Crackerjack stroke from Trott, marching down the track and lacing through mid-off for four. You have to say that was magnificent.
From Spofforth: "There are three South Africans that should have been out of the England team before Bell."
From Richard, Poole, TMS inbox: "Carlos - Would be a ‘Tragedy’ if England lose today, and the series would be ‘Better Best Forgotten.’ Think England need to change their ‘5,6,7,8’ combo and perhaps wear a ‘Deeper Shade of Blue.’ Discovered last night that Steps are managed by the same manager who looks after Stone Roses – sell out?"
From Jack in Huntingdon: "Trott should have been dropped in favour of Bell. Trott should not be in the ODI squad, ever. I just hope England don't go along at a snail's pace because of him."
Huge caught behind appeal against Kieswetter - bit of nip back off the seam - but Umpire Bowden decides that was pad, not bat. Definitely a noise, though, so a fair enough appeal. One for the Somerset man with a nurdle to leg, one for Trott, before Kieswetter nicks the strike with a cheeky single.
"India are bowling nice and straight at Trott, line and length, doing the basics well."
... Vinay is Norris on the Spot and that's a maiden over... not much of a crowd in at Mohali - and if Indians go off the shorter version of the game, we have got problems...
From Carlos, TMS inbox: "I can see England ‘Going Down’ today as it is probably ‘The Hardest Thing in the World’ to play in India. Then they’ll be ‘Driving South’ to Mumbai with the Series lost. England: 'I’m ‘Standing Here’ ‘Begging You’ to get a result today otherwise the ‘Good Times’ will be gone and I’ll be in ‘Tears’. Beat that!"
Another decent leg before appeal from Praveen - Trott shuffling across his stumps - but that was doing too much. Trott scratching about at the moment - inside edge for four - and these are testing times for the visitors against some probing seam bowling from a brace of Kumars.
From Andy in Taunton: "Everyone seems to be putting Kieswetter down really quickly, nobody else is really performing and with the way he plays, sometimes it works, sometimes it does not."
From Jim, Louth: "Would like to have seen Buttler and Borthwick get a go today, perhaps in for Dernbach and Kieswetter. No point having three keepers in your squad if the one in possession can't stop nicking off for next to nothing!"
"I think one of the problems Cook has is scoring runs down the ground against length balls, which I think you need to do in white-ball cricket. Cook tends to hang back - he's been a long way back on the crease in all three innings."
Cook gone - playing round his pad, hint of curve from Vinay, plumb lbw... Trott gets a lifter from Vinay and the ball squirts off the shoulder of the bat and down to third-man for a single. Another bumper from Vinay and Kieswetter has a go at it - skier, but he gets away with it and that's four. Dr Bowden (see below), as far as I am aware I am not dead - although I might be. Who knows? Come to think of it, I do feel very empty lately - last week I was on a beach in Sydney, now I'm back in Salford...
One for Kieswetter to short mid-wicket, good running that and some sharp fielding from young gun Kohli, who strikes me as a very useful cricketer indeed. The first wide of the innings is leg-side to Kieswetter, who had shuffled outside off, before Praveen has a decent lbw appeal turned down by Umpire Bowden. Bit of nip for Praveen, good contest so far...
"I think you should change a team to make it better or stronger - not for the sake of change. That used to be maddening in my playing career."
From Dr Will Bowden, Associate Professor of Roman Archaeology Dept. of Archaeology, University of Nottingham, in the TMS inbox: "Just noticed that the little cross you have as your wicketkeeper symbol in the team lists is the same as the convention used in academic journals to indicate that the author has died before publication. Are you telling us something?"
From Paul from Blackburn: "First and foremost Bell shouldn't have been dropped. He's our best player. He was in the form of his life. England struggling yet they still pick the same 11. Regardless, come on England."
Vinay Kumar shares the new ball with namesake Praveen, he's taking aim at Kieswetter, with a slip and a point in place. Watchful, an extravagant leave... nice lines from Vinay, ploughing a furrow outside off, bit of shape away from the right-hander, but Kieswetter eventually gets one on his pads and helps himself to three runs. Smattering of grass on the wicket, the ball zipping on...
Praveen strays on to Cook's pads and is clipped away for two easy runs. Praveen with this bustling run-up of his and it's dots all the way from there.
Right then, the man on the PA bangs the drums, players walk out - Cook could do with a knock, he always wants to be adored, and he looked like he was made of stone over in Australia - and as for Kieswetter, another low score here and it could be a case of bye, bye badman... here's Praveen Kumar, with a look that says "I want to shoot you down..."
From Jim, Essex, TMS inbox: "Stone Roses and cricket? Well I’ll give it a go. Reni keeping order behind the stumps, Mani having a chat with the punters in the deep, Squire looking uninterested and letting a dolly go through his legs at mid-wicket and Ian Brown sledging from first slip (obviously). Well that’s the way I picture it."
"There isn't a big crowd in yet, but I think people will start trickling in as the sun comes down and the heat diminishes."
Tom Craven in the TMS inbox: "Morning Ben. Sorry to hear about lack of emails last time - in a bid to rectify I wish to comment as follows: 1. I, Partridge is on Christmas list so no spoilers please; 2. Always hated that baggy Madchester scene so non-plussed describes my views on Stone Roses reformation. 3. Re cricket - still no Bell - utter madness!"
Former England captain Michael Vaughan: "Mohali is the one pitch in India that could suit England.. A little more pace and usually not as much spin."
From Bob, Newcastle: "That means Cook has now won seven out of eight tosses against Dhoni! Surely a record?"
Both sides unchanged in Mohali - fully expected of the hosts, they're grinding England into granules. Very disappointed with the volume of emails the other day, bit depressing to be honest. I, Partridge - who's read it and is it lovely stuff? Oh, and Stone Roses - the greatest comeback since Lazarus or the most ill-advised reheating since that lamb bhuna I had last night?
AN Cook*, C Kieswetter†, IJL Trott, KP Pietersen, RS Bopara, JM Bairstow, SR Patel, TT Bresnan, GP Swann, ST Finn, JW Dernbach
G Gambhir, AM Rahane, PA Patel, V Kohli, SK Raina, MS Dhoni*†, RA Jadeja, R Ashwin, R Vinay Kumar, U Yadav, P Kumar
England skipper Alastair Cook has won the toss and his boys are going to have a bat. Nineteen one-dayers at the PCA Stadium and 14 of them have been won by the side batting first. I'm all for a bit of continuity but this looks like a side badly in need of a nip and tuck - not major surgery, just nip and tuck...
Morning all. All well? Not any more - I'm hearing England are unchanged...
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