My regular coffee order at Starbucks sounds ridiculous. “I’ll have a grande, no-fat, sugar-free Cinnamon Dolce Latte, no whip. Please.” Once, a customer behind me chirped, “Would you like coffee with that?”
Now Starbucks is making it easier on patrons like myself who like to order a little coffee with their adjectives. Coffee drinks made with nonfat milk and sugar-free syrups are now called “skinny.” So I can order a “skinny” Cinnamon Dolce and get the same no-fat, sugar-free, no-whip drink without so much effort. There are also “skinny” mochas, “skinny” caramel lattes and “skinny” hazelnut lattes.
But in giving my coffee order a new, easier-to-pronounce name, Starbucks has also given me food for thought. If I can’t pronounce it easily, should I really be drinking it?
I may not have come to this conclusion had I not been reading Michael Pollan’s excellent new book, “In Defense of Food.” I learned that my coffee order breaks at least three of his rules.
- Don’t eat anything your great grandmother wouldn’t recognize as food.
- Avoid food products containing ingredients that are a) unfamiliar, b) unpronounceable, or c) more than five in number, or that include d) high-fructose corn syrup.
- Avoid food products that make health claims.
I’m not the only one fretting about the meaning of the skinny moniker. Last week, the Gothamist blog reported on a Starbucks barista who complained that the “skinny” terminology will exacerbate self-image issues of the overweight. (The Gothamist asks whether “no-fat” milk and “heavy” cream are insensitive as well.) Starbucks Gossip carries the full letter.
And while I save 200 calories by ordering the “skinny” rather than the regular Cinnamon Dolce Latte (which packs 330 calories), I’m still consuming an extra 130 calories daily in my so-called skinny drink. If I order it seven days a week for a year, that translates into a not-so-skinny 13.5 pounds worth of calories.
So thanks to Starbucks, the wisdom of Michael Pollan and the umbrage of an unnamed barista, I’ve decided to kick the flavored-coffee habit altogether. Now I’m just going to order coffee, although I’m not sure what to call it.
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