Patton Oswalt's Post-Pandemic Buffet Riff Is All-You-Can-Laugh

The comedian had the "Conan" audience eating out of his hand.
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Comedian Patton Oswalt declared Monday on “Conan” that “absolutely nothing is gonna change” as the nation recovers from the pandemic. (Watch the clip below.)

Case in point: dining out. The former “King of Queens” star told host Conan O’Brien that he once thought buffets would never return, but now he thinks they’re coming back in a most “defiant” way. And commercials will reflect that.

“We don’t have any of those woke sneezeguards like those liberal left-coast weirdos,” he said in a mock-advertising voice. “C’mon out to our cough-welcome zone.”

“We’ll build a Caesar salad right in your mouth!” he added.

O’Brien and sidekick Andy Richter served up a few jokes on the matter as well.

Fast forward to 1:40 and dig in:

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